Influence of older women in a mans life

            Something which I realize very late in life, but it is still part and parcel of learning,

I used to wonder why my brothers, I mean most of my brothers attention was only on my older sisters. I wonder if they really care for me. Whenever my second brother who was already working at a very young age ,visited us once a month, he comes home, with colourful and beautiful ribbons for my second sister, with whom he was really attached. The other three brothers were still schooling and we all grew up together , unlike the second brother.

      

          My second brothers care and concern for my sister who was born before him grew from year to year  and continued after my sister married her childhood sweet heart, who was once the villages tuition master. I was just observing my sister and brothers bond, where else myself and my younger sister were das pets, but still the older sister being the his focus.

        

         After dad left us, my sisters were playing the lead role in the family while my second brother was supporting and advising them. My sisters were very thrifty and earned money by stitching clothes, and tapping rubber, second sister was already working when i was in year 6. She was a clerk in a private firm, Those days, ladies who works in office , were looked up and , its a pride. My second brother adored her very much, because she has been supporting us with her salary and until today the  tales being talked among the family members, especially in the presence of the young ones.

       

          I was only and observer during my childhood days until when i was in form 1 , when my eldest sister who was playing the role of the mother , got married. After eldest sister married, i had to take care of the family, because , my second sister was staying in gula perak and traveled only weekends. I cooked something like soup and almost everyday and my three brothers ate it, at least 3 or four days a week I cooked Indian soup and learnt to make ‘sambal’ or gravy. So we ate sambal frequently.

      

        Almost two years nearing  after eldest sisters marriage and then my second sister married to my brother in-law who was her childhood sweetheart and immediate neighbour, this is one of the reason, my brothers bond with my sister was so strong until my sister bought a house and then when she had a child. Probably the sister’s contribution to the family is a reason why my brother was so attached to them. Later after married I observed not only my brother but others, especially those boys who have been really attached with their family older ladies showed their life long contribution to the ladies who were in their life since young, few were aunties, few were older sisters and few were, family friends, and uncles wives.

    

     These men whom Im telling about showed continues concern and care on the ladies who were successful in their life and who were dominating in the family, non of these ladies were highly  educated, but they were all full time house wives. Who controlled the husband’s salary and with it they run the family. All those men who adored the married ladies or their eldest sisters were, away from home since young and supported their family and hardly get the mothers love or attention, or even if the mother was in the family, they were more humble and was attached with their own brothers, so these young men needed a mother and these ladies were there advising them in their life.

         

         Due to more attention shown on the older, the younger ones were not really bothered, so its not surprising, the need and urge to pursue, higher education of  the young ones seemed not really important. Its really surprising, a brother was influenced by the  older sister, until the younger girls education or ambition was not bothered , but fulfilling  the older sisters wish  who happily, was given preferences. But when it was too late in life after  almost more than 35 years of gap, the brother  creates situations as though the younger sister was missing some where. This is life, something everyone need to recall, and remember, who should be given preference, the school going one or the married one for her sacrifices, even though happily married and have secured life. At times I feel very strange and used to feel if everyone is playing a drama or creating drama to get attention from the long lost and forgotten ones.